March 28th joke

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples.

The nun made a note and posted on the apple tray: “Take only ONE. God is watching.”

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child had written a note, “Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”

Batch Files

Batch File is the best interface between java program and the command prompt. - Chandana

Mar 14th - quote

"It is the highest form of self-respect to admit our errors and mistakes and make amends for them. To make a mistake is only an error in judgment, but to adhere to it when it is discovered shows infirmity of character.” - Dale E. Turner

Mar-11th joke

'Before we get married,' said John to his fiancee,'I want to confess some affairs I've had in the past.'
'But you told me all about those a couple of weeks ago,' replied the girl.
'Yes, darling,' John explained, 'but that was a couple of weeks ago.'

link for applet of a normal distribution

we can find Q-function values and confidence intervals using the following link:

http://davidmlane.com/hyperstat/z_table.html

Mar 5th - quote

Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful. - Albert Schweitzer

Mar 4th - joke

Jill tells her husband, "Jack, that young couple that just moved in next door seem such a loving twosome. Every morning, when he leaves the house, he kisses her goodbye, and every evening when he comes homes, he brings her a dozen roses.

Now, why can't you do that?"

Jack says, "I can't do that. I hardly know the girl."

Mar 2nd - quote

It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.
Confucius.

Mar 2nd - joke

Shakey went to a psychiatrist. "Doc," he said, "I've got trouble. Every time I get into bed, I think there's somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there's somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. "you gotta help me, I'm going crazy!"

"Just put yourself in my hands for two years," said the shrink. "Come to me three times a week, and I'll cure your fears."

"How much do you charge?" "A hundred dollars per visit." "I'll sleep on it," said Shakey.

Six months later the doctor met Shakey on the street. "Why didn't you ever come to see me again?" asked the psychiatrist. "For a hundred buck's a visit? A bartender cured me for ten dollars."

"Is that so! How?" "He told me to cut the legs off the bed!"